Fremocentrist Ad
Fremocentrist - logo
fre·mo·cen·trist (f'mō-sĕn'trĭst) n. one who deeply believes all in the universe revolves around the Seattle neighborhood of Fremont - fremocentric adj. see Kirby Lindsay
TAO Seal
logo small
fre·mo·cen·trist (f'mō-sĕn'trĭst) n. one who deeply believes all in the universe revolves around the Seattle neighborhood of Fremont - fremocentric adj. see Kirby Lindsay
       The Archives: Published December 23, 2010 - The Fremocentrist
‘Twas The Day Before Christmas, In Fremont

by Kirby Lindsay

with her abject apologies to the original author…

‘Twas a day before Christmas, when all through the ‘hood
all the creatures were stirring, as good creatures should;
The stores were all lively, attracting shoppers with care,
not to look desperate, yet anxious buyers shop there;

Restaurants filled with diners all jolly,
enjoying annual meals with Cousin Tim or Aunt Polly.
The bars had filled with singles looking to score,
good conversation, New Year’s date, or sumpin’ more…

Night Before Christmas img1

Neon-lit sidewalks were crowded, people failed to feel cold,
as brains teemed with wishes and visions quite bold.
Mom calls on the cell, nagging ‘bout things to get ready,
Kurt’s gift? wrapping paper? something that makes a tree steady?

Then up ahead on the sidewalk arose a loud clatter,
I shushed Mom to assess just what was the matter.
A dozen or so Santas, quite soused, cut in line,
Not my problem, so I assured Mom things were just fine.

She reminded me for Christmas dinner I’d promised to bring
taco seasoning for fajitas, which set my personal alarm all a’ring!
Sputtering farewell, I glanced up at the sky
grateful Mother Nature made forecasters predictions a lie.

Night Before Christmas img2

No storms, no snow – just another cold, drizzly, grey day
Awful for rushing out-n-about, but what is there to say?
The hike would be icky, but to places close-by
Only why always at the last minute? Big sigh.

As I began, what to my wondering eyes did appear,
but a dead dictator in bronze, unable to convey fear.
For a multi-cultural, multi-ethnic halo shimmered above,
a seasonal note more likely inspiring Fremonsters to love.

As an amusement, I rattled off public art by name,
with Patches, Chinmoy, and Rocket involved in my game.
A stop at PCC, in case taco seasoning on the shelf did sit,
it did not, but the Theo I bought for the hike was a hit!

Passing Interurban commuters, Portage Bay got a look,
then by Slippery Slope and the library with my overdue book.
Back on the sidewalk, greeting friends with a smile,
stopped for a short chat and catch up, takes a short while.

To the top of the hill, past B.F. Day mural wall,
Dash past Powerhouse, past Paseo, dash past them all!
At Marketime, find proper seasonings, at last,
then dash ‘cross the street, rent a movie, real fast.

For laying a finger aside of my nose,
I feel the raindrops, and the drip of my clothes.
Down the hill, down the hill, down the hill, now,
a long hike raced down, in mere seconds, oh, wow!

Into the house, ready to prepare and to bake,
so many cookies, dishes and gifts yet to make.
Whether Happy Solstice, Kwanzaa, Chanukah, or Festivus
Merry Christmas, or just wishing Happy New Year to the rest of us.

The sign above Deluxe Junk says it all,
Peace!, it says, above the door, on the wall.
So enjoy a weekend off, meals, gifts or whatever you want,
a Happy Holiday season to all, including all of Fremont!

Related Nonsense

©2010 Kirby Lindsay.  This column is protected by intellectual property laws, including U.S. copyright laws.  Reproduction, adaptation or distribution without permission is prohibited.

Fremocentrist Logo Sm Home Contact Me | Website:Cougar Mountain Productions ©2009 - 2011 The Fremocentrist